3rd July 2005
Making the most of having time to myself. Rick left at 8.30 am to take Barry to the station then went off for his ‘weekend’ away with the mens group from the church. It’s been years since I’ve had this much time to myself so I’ve been making the most of it.
I rang Anthony yesterday morning and we chatted for ages. Anthony asked about his birth certificate so I explained why I didn’t have it …. either lost or stolen and that is why I didn’t give it to him months ago. I have a good excuse to get a replacement now then send it on to him as it will be easier for me to apply for one than him. Will make sure I do a colour copy for myself first though. A brought up the subject of the adoption papers which I hadn’t expected but managed to get through this discussion. Anthony knew I was getting upset telling him what information I had and he was actually sensitive about this and seemed to understand. It was repeating the lies that got to me particularly my parents claiming that they found I was pregnant two weeks before having him when in fact they knew long before. Also that my mother claimed she couldn’t help me look after him due to her health when, in fact, she told me she didn’t want to help me and she was adamant he should be adopted …. end of story. It was painful going through this but A wanted to know and I want him to know the truth …. my parents have got away for too many years deceiving people with their little fantasy version of what really happened. Revenge is so sweet though as he back with a vengeance now and nobody is going to come between us now. I love him so much it almost hurts.