Relinquishment, the hardest thing to do for any woman,
Her baby lost to adoption, never to be hers again,
Sadness, pain, torn to pieces, two lives that need repairing,
The future is bleak for the mother who’s lost her child.

Enduring onwards, the pain to be beaten down,
Despair and heartache always there, hidden by a smile,
Pretending the world is rosy and moving forever on,
The hard exterior hiding so many cracks beneath.

Undying love for the lost child keeps her going on,
The years go by and the memory never, ever fades,
Work occupies her mind during the day, partying at night,
Life has to go on , the act never broken as she is strong.

Nothing really changes inside with birthdays as a reminder,
Men come and go in her life as she will not commit,
Too frightened to get close, too frightened to be pregnant,
Fears of pressure and lies that cannot be fought again.

Intense pain eventually buried so deep inside her soul,
Needing to be loved before she is too old for love,
A young man, younger then her, determined to win her,
She accepts his love, frightened to end her life alone.

Trust in another begins to grow though not completely,
She needs another despite being guarded and keeps control,
They marry and travel through their life together cautiously,
The years go by with her still hurting but not alone.

Eventually her dream comes true for closure at last,
To find her son simply by chance, not prepared,
Her heart acts then her head takes over in complete fear,
The fear dispels, the response from her son positive.

Dreams do come true for those good of heart and faith,
Today I couldn’t be happier even if I tried any harder,
My Lord took me on a journey I couldn’t begin to understand,
Yet now I do knowing my precious son is alive.


About Philippa

I am married to Rick and we live in a small town in County Durham. We have two dogs, a cat and two budgies. I am also an adoption survivor. In 1981 my son was born and I was then forced to surrender him. It took 23 years and reunion for my to find out that my son's adoption was legally known as a forced adoption and illegal but social workers got away with it because mothers didn't know their rights.
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