2nd October 2005

Been in a pretty good mood for me today despite listening to two boring sermons at church today. After the morning meeting we went along to the monthly meal with the fellowship over at the resource centre. I wasn’t looking forward to it as Rick has eaten Kevin’s food at the men’s weekend away and hadn’t been too impressed with it. Apart from the beef being overcooked to the point of the meat falling apart it wasn’t too bad. It made a change for me not to cook and we had a bit of fun. We laughed about the pastor having two portions of apple pie but I had been warned he likes his food.

Had about 2 and 1/2 hours at home before the evening meeting so I’ve felt a bit sorry for the dogs today but they have been well behaved. The evening meeting over ran which didn’t amuse me so we got home later than usual.

The medication is certainly working now. I still have my bad days but not so often and I don’t feel so low at the time. It is a relief to feel better and I feel like I have had a weight taken off my shoulders. I will be glad when the counselling starts as I need to get my head around the baggage I’ve been carrying all these years. My family have got a lot to answer for but if I tried to tell them it would go over their heads and they would justify why they treated me the way they did. They will never accept they did anything wrong and would only tell me I got what I deserved. I know I’m not a bad person.


About Philippa

I am married to Rick and we live in a small town in County Durham. We have two dogs, a cat and two budgies. I am also an adoption survivor. In 1981 my son was born and I was then forced to surrender him. It took 23 years and reunion for my to find out that my son's adoption was legally known as a forced adoption and illegal but social workers got away with it because mothers didn't know their rights.
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