Neighbour behaving badly

We recently found out that Rick does suffer with angina and one of his arteries has lost 30% activity.  This means more tablets and spray plus Rick getting the ‘lose weight’ and ‘quit smoking’ lectures.  We have been under stress for a couple of months which hasn’t helped.

On one of our forums there were attacking posts towards two of us which caused knee jerk reactions.  The ones that started it apologized but the other person wouldn’t let the matter drop.  To cut a long story short I got caught in the cross fire, he caused trouble by stirring it and sent one member emails.  He and a couple of members set up a freebie forums and some of the members went over to it.  On top of that I got the blame for the trouble when all I tried to do was sort the mess out.  Some really hurtful comments were made as well which made my mood worse.  March through to late March / early April depending on when Mother’s Day is a bad time of year for me anyway.  This went on through May die to one person causing trouble and making out it was me.  This eventually stopped but a neighbour has been causing trouble.

The next door neighbour complains for complaining sakes and his wife who is actually a nice lady excuses his bad behaviour on being bipolar.  We’ve got to the stage that we can’t take any more and have pointed out to our community team officer that we both suffer with depression but we don’t use that as an excuse to behave badly.  Anyway for some time his complaint has been that we don’t clear up after our dogs when they have pooped in the back garden.  This is complete rubbish and the officer knows this as she has been round twice about the matter.  We were so fed up of it and the run ins with him that I gave her a list of problems we have had.  He’s chucked plants over our garden on the grounds that they were in his way and bags of cuttings which split.  This was on the grounds that they were in his way (there is a right of way across the back gardens) despite being by our step and he had to walk round that anyway with his lawn mower.  He has pulled up plants at the end of the garden for no reason at all.  We’ve suffered periods when he has been noisy all day every day for several days on end including early morning.  His dog is never on the lead.  Max (dog) is beautiful and very friendly.  Our problem is he knows our two are tetchy with other dogs and the reason why yet he has no respect for us.  There have been other minor issues such as constantly going backwards and forwards through the garden but the final straw was recently when he chucked garden furniture which was by the step so unnecessary and he tried to peer through our window.  There was no need for it and it made me jump.

Rick rang up to complain and for about a week there weren’t any problems.  It was too good to be true.  On Saturday I went out to clear up after the dogs.  He came out and started having a go at me about the dog poop covering the whole garden and it smelt due to the weather.  I was very sharp and told him I only had to clear up three.  He wouldn’t have it and told me that I must be blind not to see it.  I went in to calm down then went out to take the bags round the side to the front so I could put them in the bin.  He was out the front with Max racing around all over the place.  The neighbour started again and I got really annoyed as he started on about us having the dirtiest, smelliest home on the street.  I pointed out that he’s never been in our home so he doesn’t know what he’s talking about.  He then claimed the smell goes through the walls which is rubbish.  I completely snapped and told him I was sick to death of him never having his dog under control.  The idiot started on about there is no law saying he has to have the dog on the lead so I told him I never said that.  He then tried the ‘it’s not his fault our dogs aren’t sociable’ line.  I was furious by this time because the worst our two do is bark at other dogs.  I retorted back that  at least we are responsible dog owners which is more than he is and came back in.

The community team officer came round to see us today and I virtually ended up in tears over the matter.  She knows I can’t take any more and could have quite easily walked out on Saturday afternoon and that I’m suicidal.  She is putting it in the intervention team’s hands now as he is refusing to stop the bad behaviour.  It’s going to be next week before we hear from them but at least she is on our side.

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About Philippa

I am married to Rick and we live in a small town in County Durham. We have two dogs, a cat and two budgies. I am also an adoption survivor. In 1981 my son was born and I was then forced to surrender him. It took 23 years and reunion for my to find out that my son's adoption was legally known as a forced adoption and illegal but social workers got away with it because mothers didn't know their rights.
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